Feeling hopless and depressed...and can't shake it .

Sherri · Feeling hopless and depressed...and can't shake it .

Im not goin to get too much into the reasons...but, more of less I feel overwhelmed, and don't know how or where to start to make it beter.

I supposed CH's take their toll, at times...I look around, and see their is some much that is behind...so much catching up to do to get my life in order...

At times like this, I just don't know where to start to gt my life right...that doesn't mean magically having CHH's go away...it's fixing the mess it creates...from my finances beng a mess, everything being disorganized, and feeling so overhwelmed of how to make it organized.

I just wanted to go away....far, far away, and start over. Just walk out of my apt, leaving this mess...and starting over somewhere else, where no one knows me.

Haviing a house, to start a new life in...Orgamized, new...just a chance to start over....Im feeling very, very down today. I don't like it here My Dr. minimizes it all, as well as some of m friends....often bringing up the example of "people have survived the holocaust, and live good life...Im just feeling real down, and like a failure.

Seeing no way out. Thanks for listening.

Em

Hey hey hey! Come on now. There is always a way out and there is always someone here to listen. You are loved here and so this only ever comes from the heart.

Running away will not resolve anything. The only way to deal with sh*t is to start picking it up, once piece at a time. Make a list of everything that is worrying you. Seeing things down on paper will help, either by making you see that things aren't as bad, or you can start to write down solutions. Then you have a checklist to tick off as you acheive something.

If you really hate where you live don't just leave. You need to fix things first. We have a wealth of talent and skills here. What can we help you with?

My finances were in SUCH a mess when I met Stephen. I couldn't keep to a budget, I spent endlessly, got myself in trouble and then buried my head in the sand and denied it was even happening. I would go to bed feeling sick and was in a right state all the time so what did I do to cheer myself up? Spend more. Then he wanted to move in together. I knew I had to act or there was no way I'd be getting a mortgage. I have some useful tools now for making sure I know where I stand with money (one being my accountant fiance and his mussolini-style control over my finances). I'm happy to share them with you!!

We love you! Don't just give up. You're strong, a surviver and there ain't nothing that you can't get through. Especially not with a backup team like us, ain't that right Ike and Phil!!

Email me if you need anything at all and you're always welcome to call.

xx

Em

PS - I'm also an expert organiser!! Just say the word dearest... xx

Ike

Sher ...........

From the 1st pm you sent me on ch.com (i still have it ) i kenw you would be in my life forever ! your one of the strongest people ive ever had the pleasure of talking with. dispite all the wanky bollox shit you have had and been through your still one of the kindest people ive met, most people that have had it hard are just me, me, me NOT you ! you listen and not only do you listen but you care about what your listening to, you take it in digest it and give back you HONEST views. not that sugar i F**k love about you.

being down is not being weak ! we all get down but like you we get back up again! and AGAIN so will you !,

you will stand up straight dust your self off say F**k you to the world and carry right on being who you are and the person you are is F**k brilliant ! ill use a word that you might not get, but you my dear are narley !!!!

narley means that top the bollox of the bollox and where i come from is the highest complement ever !!

You WILL be ok.

I love you Sher aways have and always will.

Ike X

phil h

You can and will shake it. Hits will lighten up , you'll get some rest , and the inner XENA will return to battle . Love , phil

Em

Let us know you're ok Sherri.

We love you and are rootin' for you!

Em

Jill

Sherri...

I hope that this finds you feeling a little bit better. I am sorry that you are feeling so down and blue.

Sometimes, I have learned, when life becomes overwhelming and hard to manage you just have to put everything down and do something just for you. I usually try to go to the beach where I feel peaceful or talk a walk in the woods. It does not matter what it is, it is just taking that time out to do something for you to recenter.

Even meditating, don't laugh because it is true, can make you refocus. I have a really good one about centering that I can send to you if you want.

Don't get me wrong, it is not the cure all but it can help you re-focus and give you the energy to tackle what needs to be done.

Emily is right, running away does not solve anything because you will end up with the same problems as before but in a new location. Also the old issues will come back so that you will have double whammy. I have been there and done that.. it is not fun.

Anyways, I want to write more but I have a dog in the tub that needs to be dried.

I hope that this helps some, I know that it might sound wacko but it can help..

Thinking of you..

...

Jill

PS I am adding this because I am afraid that I what I said does not make sense and will seem like I am saying that this is easy to do or easy for you to overcome.

The reason that I mentioned the meditation or going somewhere that makes you feel good is because by re-focusing, you gain the strength that you need to deal with the CH and everything else that is going on.

I have found that with the CH, though it does not diminish the pain at all, I can find strength that I did not know that I had to dance another dance. We all have it in us, it is just finding it that is hard.

Hope that this makes more sense.

Sherri

You ALL are the best...thankyou for the encouragement...the push, as if we're almost to the top of the mountain, and every fiber in my body is screaming '"NOOOO"

....and all together, you get behind me, put all of your hands on my back and push me...all the way to the top.

I love you all for that. :smt022

Em

And we'll keep pushing... Even if you're kicking and screaming!!!

Sherri

Sure enough, I got what I wanted. Not in the way I wanted it, but I got it.
I guess that's were the saying "be careful what you wish for" comes from.

You know, I'd give anything to be back at my apt, and do just what Em suggested. There were things out of my control, that caused what was about to happen one month later.

It's true, you have to make a plan, tick off one thing at a time...I look forward to reporting back and telling all of you, things are much, much better...hopefully I will find this thread again, to remind me of how far I came.

Love All of You. P.S. History does repeat itself if you don't just decide to solve your obstacles....very true Jill

Ike

And the same still stands today you need something you ask and we will jump to it, we are all 100% behind you (although i feel like im more standing beside you holding your hand, than standing behind)

Love you, and you will laugh 1 day when you read back on this and say i F**k made it !!

Tami

Sherri i know what you mean by be careful what you wish for!! i wished for atleast 3weeks before i had Riley for him to hurry up and come out and looked what happened.

But at the end of the day it all works out in the end.I know you are not back to where you want to be but it will come your way in the end !!

phil h

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FAD3GmlB1c Always on your side .

Sherri

Yeah Tam...we learn don't we When I wrote that original post, I had come so, so far And knew what was about to happen to me.

In some cases, it's choices...some it's not. I should've tried to fix things a year before...I don't know what I was thinking at all.

In your case, you didn't have a choice. But, look at your gorgeous son. I was so scared when you were pregnant...and stressed out. Im so glad he's here.

Tam, if you take anything from what you've seen me go through, do it right the first time...even if it's harder and takes longer...or it will show up again. Ok little sister? Love You. Sherri

Tami

Thanx Sherri im not a person to let anything or anyone get ontop of me i dont like leaving things till the last min unless i dont have a choice.

Im glad we are back here now under this internet roof and have each other 2 hold eachother up xxx

Sherri

Tam I have always looked at you as a go getter. You take care of business.

I was so so tired then, I had gone through six yrs of hell, I wasn't embraced by anyone at home. I was on very shaky legs. Looking back, as hindsight is 20/20, I should've just been strong. I had been beaten up.

I have learned a valuable lesson now Just do it. In the end, only I will live with the consequences.

If only. Now, I have to start where I am, dust myself off. It doesn't matter what happened before. NOW is the only thing that matters.

Im glad we're here for eachother. Once again and for always